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Mannulus’ “Sassy Saddles Meets Sasquatch”

28 Saturday Mar 2020

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Today’s story is a rare find.

Sassy Saddles Meets Sasquatch
[Comedy] [Random] • 5,886 words

The legend is known throughout Equestria, but there are few who believe. Those who claim to have seen the beast are dismissed as crackpots and madponies. Those who bring evidence before the world are dismissed as histrionic deceivers. There are those who have seen, however — those who know — and they will forever cry out their warning from the back seats of filthy, old train cars, even to those who dismiss them, who revile them, who ignore their warnings unto their own mortal peril.

“The sasquatch is real!” they will cry forevermore, even as nopony believes.

But from this day forward, Sassy Saddles will believe.

FROM THE CURATORS: While many of our features trend toward the emotionally weighty, sometimes you just want a good laugh as a palate cleanser.  And this one was quite a find.  “I’ve not read a comedy like this in quite some time,” Present Perfect said in his nomination. “The jokes are lightning-fast and begin as soon as the story does. This is nothing but wacky pony hijinks and cutting dialogue.”  AugieDog quickly agreed while assigning it a top score: “Oh, my goodness, yes.” And Soge was similarly delighted: “I was in the mood for comedy, and this delivers in spades.  Whenever a joke fails to land, it is quickly followed up by ten more that do.”

However, what AugieDog found most impressive was the balancing act the story required.  “Real, honest-to-goodness goofiness, I continue to hold, is about the hardest sort of writing to do well,” he said.  “You need a story that can hold up as an actual story while being bent out of shape and knocked askew from every possible direction. The characters have to do things that make sense in context even though they’re completely absurd. And the dialogue has to sparkle with wit one sentence, stumble into stupidity the next.  This story delivers on all possible fronts, from how foundational Sassy’s sassiness is to her entire self-image to the footnote in the middle of the saga of the two rat kings.”

That was enriched by consistent writing, Present Perfect said: “Sassy Saddles is hilariously stubborn in her dedication to sass, in the same way the story is hilariously dedicated to its own ridiculous premise.”  And, as Soge said, that made it a solid choice: “Coupled with the pitch-perfect absurd logic with which the story operates, and a colorful cast of supporting characters, it makes for a sure-fire nomination.”

Read on for our author interview, in which Mannulus discusses brony rarity, Rarity beatdowns, and big-box luthiers.
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Wallflower Blush’s “How To Dominate Your Neighbor’s Lawn”

29 Friday Mar 2019

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Today’s story will grow on you.

How To Dominate Your Neighbor’s Lawn
[Comedy] [Random] • 2,241 words

Even when faced with the rise of Tirek and the loss of her own cutie mark, Roseluck never fails to tend her lawn.

FROM THE CURATORS: The wordplay flew like grass clippings as we discussed this tale.  (For example, AugieDog quipped, “Monomania is often a rich and fragrant source of humor, and this one’s got that in spades.”)  But even though the fic started out as an entry to the Comedy (Is Serious Business) contest, it turned our head with some serious writing skills.  “What strikes me about the excellent writing is the strong character voicing,” Present Perfect said in his nomination.  “Roseluck is not exactly a normal pony, but she’s very sure about what it is she wants in life.”  RBDash47 agreed: “I think it’s a great example of how someone can take a background character with no real established characterization and run with it. It was a short fic but I feel like I have a perfect understanding of who Roseluck is and what she stands for.”

We found that drawing us into the story.  “I love that this is told in the first person,” AugieDog said.  “My favorite sort of craziness is the kind that’s presented as not just an everyday occurrence but as an integral part of a narrator’s life. By throwing us into it headfirst, the author just envelops us in the crunchy green madness.”  And that led to a satisfying payoff.  “This was definitely a lot of fun, especially Roseluck’s comeuppance, which is either a fantastic coincidence or laser-guided karma,” FanOfMostEverything said.  “The fact that life goes on Ponyville in the midst of Tirek’s rampage says a lot about the town and its citizens, and the interplay between Roseluck and Lyra establishes the characters both thoroughly and efficiently.”

Some of the story’s technology provoked conversation, too.  “I was impressed at how gas-powered lawnmowers are eased into Equestria by virtue of them being eldritch sources of dark power,” Present Perfect said, while RBDash47 countered: “I don’t know that I love gas-powered lawnmowers existing in Equestria, but otherwise I am pleasantly surprised.”  That caused FanOfMostEverything to note: “You feed it the rendered blood of monstrosities long past and it then eviscerates anything that crosses its path. I’m pretty sure a gas-powered lawnmower qualifies as an eldritch artifact in our universe.”

Read on for our author interview, in which Wallflower Blush discusses eating candy, inflated guts, and satiated hunger.
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RandomNPC’s “Winning, and the pitfalls therein.”

11 Friday Jan 2019

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Give today’s story a chance to conquer your heart.

Winning, and the pitfalls therein.
[Comedy] [Random] [Alternate Universe] • 42,517 words

What if the villains were allowed to win without a fight? Would all of their plans bear them the fruits they so desired?

Probably not, especially when their royal adviser is Twilight Sparkle.

A collection of (continuous) one-shots in which our heroes don’t have any epic fights with villains, and simply allow the power of logic to crush all of the hopes and wishes of the would-be rulers of Equestria.

FROM THE CURATORS: “It’s a question every would-be tyrant has to face eventually,” FanOfMostEverything quipped in our discussion.  “You’ve conquered the kingdom/world/galaxy/universe. Congratulations. Now what?”

As this week’s feature shows, that’s a question with a surprising amount of depth — a depth matched by the story itself.  “It’s hard to categorize this genre-wise, except that it’s relentlessly clever and methodical about finding ways to end-run around the show’s plot holes,” Horizon said in his nomination, and our debate was marked by repeated comments about that cleverness.  “The writing itself is somewhat flat, but the world presented therein is anything but,” RBDash47 said, while FanOfMostEverything half-disagreed: “I honestly didn’t notice the flat writing; the brilliant ideas shine through it.”

Those ideas sparked comparisons of the best kind.  “This feels an awful lot like the gleeful deconstruction of Eliezer Yudkowsky’s Harry Potter and the Methods of Rationality, mashed up with the themes of redemption and friendship which make MLP stories feel ‘pony’, and I’m in love with the result,” Horizon said.  RBDash47 was equally a fan — but for very different reasons.  “I just finished a re-watch of The West Wing,” he said, “and I’m reminded of that series here, in that it’s both optimistic and features competent characters coming up with clever solutions to seemingly-intractable problems that make everyone happy. I very much enjoyed following along with Twilight as she mercilessly attacked her antagonists with nothing but pure reason, and gradually found herself as the power behind the throne in the balance.”

But what sealed the deal for us was strong character work.  “Where it really shines is how Twilight isn’t always right,” FanOfMostEverything said.  “Logical and internally consistent, yes, but not always right. The avenues she goes down add to both the humor and the depth of the story at every turn, and the increasingly absurd team of advisors she builds as time goes on only adds to that.”  AugieDog praised that as well: “When Twilight almost immediately jumps to the wrong conclusion at the beginning of the Chrysalis section, it did a lot to make this version of the character work.”  (“The entire Chrysalis arc is just gorgeous on toast,” Horizon added.)  Ultimately, we found that made this story stand out amid a sea of others tinkering with the show’s results: “‘Fixfic’ can be a dirty word,” RBDash47 said, “but I have to admire this one.”

Read on for our author interview, in which RandomNPC discusses SCIENCE, sibling relations, and a few different kinds of character redemption.
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Kris Overstreet’s “An Orderly Transfer of Power”

07 Friday Apr 2017

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(Note: We’re looking to re-feature three of our spotlighted authors!  Our “Correct the Record” contest runs through Sunday, April 23.  Weigh in with your votes and nominations on our FIMFiction thread.)

Today’s story will oh-so-politely take over your funny bone.

An Orderly Transfer of Power
[Comedy] [Random] • 8,892 words

Straight from the Canterlot archives, this collection of documents retells the rise and fall of Princess Twilight Sparkle, Enlightened Despot of Equestria, Defender of the Peace, Lawgiver, and Commander of Fort Libris.

Twilight Sparkle is, of course, known to historians as the first usurper to seek to schedule a coup d’etat by appointment. But for other details- such as, “What is the longest recorded time a pony has gone without sleep?”, “Is it true what they say about swans?”, and, “Why is there an owlbear in the Equestrian Witness Protection Program?”- these documents provide the answers and much, much more.

This is ABSOLUTELY SERIOUS HISTORY from primary sources. If anything makes you think this is silly, ludicrous, or unbelievable, blame Discord.

FROM THE CURATORS: It’s a testament to the quality of the entries in FanOfMostEverything’s recent “Imposing Sovereigns” contest that a story as consistently excellent as this one could walk away without a medal.  “This is start-to-finish hilarious,” Horizon said.  “It would have been good just with the core joke of Twilight Sparkle wanting to schedule a coup, but it takes that premise, starts sprinting with it, and doesn’t slow down for 9,000 words.”  In his nomination, AugieDog said much the same: “This hits every humorous note of its premise spot-on, from Official Historian Moondancer’s side note to Discord at the beginning to Twilight’s final two-word message.”  Present Perfect’s praise was even more glowing: “This is marvelous right from the get-go, a masterpiece of in-universe writing and bureaucratic comedy rivalling the originator of the genre.”

What was even more remarkable, we agreed, was that this story “maintains its tight comedic pace while sticking strictly to the epistolary style,” as Horizon put it.  “The letters that tell the tale are well-chosen, and the story it tells is rich and robust.”  Present Perfect appreciated the story’s diversity: “The breadth of document types keeps things both fresh and realistic.”  And Chris approved of the story’s careful balancing act.  “The choice of which documents to show strikes a great balance between overly specific and too unfocused, giving the reader plenty to chortle over without bogging down under the weight of its own epistolism,” he said.

That this could entertain us so greatly despite the ways in which it distorted canon was the cherry on top.  “You do have to accept a certain amount of Trollestia as the price of entry … but the author then uses that premise in a variety of wonderfully funny ways,” Chris said.  That was ultimately what won Present Perfect over: “Though I’m usually a stickler for Twilight and Celestia’s relationship,” he said, “the ridiculous way Twilight goes about staging a coup helps ground her actions in her character, and it’s certainly not as hard to swallow Twilight getting fed up with taking Celestia’s crap.”

Read on for our author interview, in which Kris Overstreet discusses thermonuclear cherries, token rednecks, and discovering empathy for Rarity.
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LiterarySerenity’s “The Legend of the Gift Horses”

24 Friday Feb 2017

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Today’s story might just contain an element of truth.

gift-horsesThe Legend of the Gift Horses
[Random] • 2,056 words

If you have ever wondered how the saying “Don’t look a gift horse in the mouth” came to be, please venture inside and learn one fairytale version of this tale.

FROM THE CURATORS: There are many elements that go into an enjoyable fairy tale, and we found that this one fired on all cylinders — from voice and structure to character and ideas.  “This is a fantastic in-universe tale, one that almost seems to delight in its own telling,” Present Perfect said.  “I actually got a thrill when Wish was saved, and I adore that Starswirl takes on certain mythic proportions of his own.”  AugieDog also enjoyed it all.  “Fun and well told,” he said.  “My only quibble is that the story ends too soon.  I wanted it all to keep going and going. That for me is the sign of a story really getting its hooks into me.”

Others found the story growing on them as it developed.  “This starts out looking like a well-constructed but slightly stock fairytale,” Chris said, “but in the aftermath of the battle (near the halfway point in the story), it suddenly becomes much more creative than I was giving it credit for.”  Horizon agreed: “This goes places I wasn’t expecting, and I have to give it props for its fusion of its two core mythological components.”  Chris further commented on the tale’s balancing act: “It deftly straddles the line between using well-known imagery and relying on cliches.”

All told, those elements added up to more than just the titular fable.  “I found myself appreciating this both as a piece of storytelling, and as story in its own right,” Chris said, and Present Perfect agreed: “This is easy to approach on its dual merits.”

Read on for our author interview, in which LiterarySerenity discusses coyote similarities, parental bookshelves, and world-hopping Merlins.
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The Minister of Scones’ “Somepony Tries to Sell Twilight Insurance”

10 Friday Feb 2017

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If you’re in the market for a comic tale, today’s story has a deal for you.

somepony-tries-to-sellSomepony Tries to Sell Twilight Insurance
[Comedy] [Random] [Slice of Life] • 6,260 words

Ballpoint Smudge has one job. It’s not an easy one, but it’s one he’s determined to do to the best of his ability. The only problem is that as soon as he meets Twilight Sparkle, everything he’s ever learned about princesses goes flying out of the window. He was expecting her to be regal, haughty and bossy. Instead she’s warm, friendly and welcoming. Perhaps she’s genuinely a nice pony? Nah. It’s got to be a test.

FROM THE CURATORS: Although the central gimmick of this story is right on display in the title, “this is no one-note joke of a fic,” Chris said in his nomination.  “A pleasant blend of conversational humor, exaggerated characters — the protagonist’s conversation with his boss is the high point of the story — and even a light moral, this is one of those works that is just effortlessly enjoyable from start to finish.”  Broad agreement followed, along with compliments on the story’s breadth.  “The voicing and general writing are the highlight here, along with that boss scene Chris mentions,” Present Perfect said.  “The lightning-fast dialogue is easy to follow and only adds to the humor.”

He wasn’t the only one to praise the subtle whimsy on display.  “From the very first paragraphs, I loved the narrative voice,” AugieDog said.  “The sort of Terry Pratchet/Douglas Adams humor on display here is a delicate balancing act, and the author manages it better than most.”  Soge went further: “There is real skill on display here, from the superb voicing to the intricate characterization and the late reveal about Twilight. It’s one of those fics that makes me want to instantly follow the author.”

But there was more than the voicing to like.  Chris pointed out the melding of nostalgia and modernity: “It captures an early-season feel (right down to a letter to Celestia!) while grounding itself firmly in the S6 era,” he said.  And AugieDog approved of the story’s extension of its sources.  “Even the way the author pretty much quotes word for word the insurance dialogue from Ambrose Bierce’s The Devil’s Dictionary serves the story well,” he said.  “The author takes the lines, expands them to make them work in a pony context, and takes them somewhere Bierce would never have imagined in his wildest dreams.”

Read on for our author interview, in which The Minister of Scones discusses fifth earls, hot water bottles, and summary pie.
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Chessie’s “The Equestrian Opposition Party”

16 Friday Dec 2016

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Keep your friends close, your enemies closer, and your eye on today’s story.

The Equestrian Opposition Party
[Comedy] [Random] [Slice of Life] • 8,333 words

equestrian-oppositionAfter more than a thousand years of comfortably occupying the throne, Celestia has more than a few enemies.  Every month, they gather to plot her downfall and commiserate over their past failures.  For those fed up with the status quo and ready to see a change, the E.O.P. has ever been a home and respite against the slings and arrows of dull, predictable government.

Today, a new pony joins their ranks.

(Equestrian Political Satire – Be warned!  There will be discussions, debate, civil disagreement, and beer.  Sweet mercy, there will be beer.)

FROM THE CURATORS: After this year’s real-life political circuses, you might be forgiven for running screaming from any story centered around the topic — but in this case, you’d be missing out.  “This is a great example of how to write a comedy with political notes which doesn’t become offensive or excessively reductivist,” Chris said.  AugieDog agreed — “there are no ‘straw ponies’ here” — and it equally turned Present Perfect’s head: “This is quality political humor, up with the Civil Service-verse.”

Part of that was the story’s deft touch in expanding its characters beyond just their given roles.  “This was great reading as slice-of-life about a collection of eccentric misfits, and the ultimate message felt heartwarmingly pony despite the genre of political humor being filled with no small number of bottomless pits and dead-ends,” Horizon said.  It also didn’t hurt that the humor consistently landed, Present Perfect noted.  “It’s a rip-roaring comedy filled with characters who are instantly likable,” he said.  “The joke about the machine sobbing and exploding nearly made me die.”  And every one of us had good things to say about the ending.  “The reveal somehow snuck up on me, even though in hindsight it seemed like the most natural thing in the world, which is always a great sign,” Horizon said, and Present Perfect agreed: “The twist at the end I did not see coming, and it only made the whole thing better, not to mention more believable.”

But all of that would have felt hollow without this story’s gentle touch on an often polarizing topic, and that by itself made it worth reading.  “One of the problems with political humor is that most writers only seem interested in taking the easy way out, belittling the characters and turning them into cardboard caricatures,” AugieDog said.  “This story has fun with the various political beliefs of the characters, but in the end, we see them as Celestia does: as honest, actual ponies who want to make Equestria a better place.”

Read on for our author interview, in which Chessie discusses created gods, clone cooks, and blood-shooting eyes.

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Hoopy McGee’s “The Cutie Mark Allocation Agency”

30 Friday Sep 2016

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Today’s story will leave its mark on you.

cutie-mark-allocationThe Cutie Mark Allocation Agency
[Comedy] [Random] • 35,789 words

‘Unseen and unheard: They must never know’.

That’s the motto of the CMAA, the Cutie Mark Allocation Agency. Nopony knows who they are or what they do, but they’re vital to the workings of Equestrian society.

This is the story of two of these unsung heroes of the pony world, who selflessly sacrifice their time and energy for those blasted mysterious cutie marks that the ponies seem to like so much.

FROM THE CURATORS: In the hands of many authors, this story’s core idea — that a band of snipers targets foals and fillies with Cutie Mark guns — would have become a brief and forgettable one-shot, but it doesn’t take long for this story to transcend its roots.  “There’s nothing I love so much as watching an author take a crackfic idea seriously, plant the seed, and then have something beautiful blossom from that,” Horizon said, and as soon as we’re introduced to the gnome Glummwriggle and his employer and coworkers, that beauty is apparent.  “The cast is probably best described as ‘David the Gnome meets Office Space‘ (a thoroughly intuitive pairing, I think you’ll agree),” Chris said, “and Hoopy’s knack for observational comedy and asides in general shines in that setting.”

There were plenty of other things to appreciate, as Present Perfect noted. “This story is a lot of fun,” he said.  “It’s quirky, it’s whimsical, it’s charming, and I really enjoyed reading it. The stakes are always clear, the pacing is quick and smooth, and the idea behind it is so goofy, yet plays out in a perfectly serious way.”  Horizon similarly appreciated the crispness of the storytelling — “the pacing here was dynamic; I never felt that nothing was going on” — while Chris was enchanted by the comedic twists of the prose: “My notes on the story are pretty much just a bunch of funny lines that I highlighted.”

Even the bit parts contributed to the story with outsized flair and memorability.  “Shadeswell is a perfect example of everything this story gets right, a smart blend of ridiculous, serious, and self-subversive,” Horizon said, and AugieDog offered an insightful suggestion as to why: “What I liked most about this story was its deft use of so many cliches.  Too many authors use them as shortcuts to avoid doing any creative thinking. So when an author actually uses cliches in a creative fashion, it always gets a grin out of me.  Knowing when to undercut a cliche is important — such as with Shadeswell — but it’s also important to let some cliches play out, and the author does both to good comedic effect throughout.”

Read on for our author interview, in which Hoopy McGee discusses Shyamalan subversions, Tirek tea parties, and garden gag gifts.

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Oroboro’s “Starlight Glimmer and Sunset Shimmer Are Dead”

23 Friday Sep 2016

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I’m stuck inside today’s story, trying to find a way out.  (Please send help.)

starlight-sunset-are-deadStarlight Glimmer and Sunset Shimmer Are Dead
[Comedy] [Crossover] [Random] • 3,837 words

Two magical prodigies cast in Twilight’s shadow stumble about in somepony else’s story and try to find meaning in their lives.

An affectionate parody of Tom Stoppard’s Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead. Which is in itself an absurdist and existentialist parody of Hamlet.

FROM THE CURATORS: With many of our featured authors, we face a difficult choice of which of their RCL-quality stories to spotlight — and in this case, we decided that good things come in small packages.  “I’ve been trying for months now to work up a pitch for either of Oroboro’s 100,000+ word epics, The Heart of an Author or Fractured Sunlight, but this story displays all the author’s positives without making anyone take a week off to read it,” AugieDog said.

Chief among those positives was Oroboro’s way with words.  “My favorite part of this is how the dialogue changes when it stops being ‘their story’,” Present Perfect said.  “Everyone talks like an overblown stage actor; it’s quirky and marvelous and just a fascinating way to show what’s going on.”  That deft touch extended from the small touches to some larger ones.  “This story certainly chooses its fourth-wall breaks well, and every one of them got a grin out of me,” Horizon said.  “The narrator judging the story with ‘Then she galloped off to save her marefriend or whatever’ was a great blend of subtle and satirical.  And I love that it effortlessly shifts back and forth from that sort of hilarity to sober discussions of stories and our role in them.”

Our biggest debate was over how authentic this was to the source that it drew from.  “This does just enough to distinguish itself from R&GAD to be a fresh take on the subject,” Chris said, “but I don’t think this makes any cogent statement about secondary realities or fictional existence the same way the source material does.”  To AugieDog, however, that was a positive: “This takes the idea of the existential metadrama and makes it absolutely Pony,” he said.  “Yes, Starlight and Sunset come to realize that the story they’re in isn’t about them at all, but their reactions to this state of affairs are nicely free of angst, and the ending gives the two more leeway than Rosencrantz and Guildenstern get in the last scene of their play.” And Horizon thought this was best evaluated as its own story rather than as a statement on Stoppard’s play: “Whether or not this is meaningful in the meta, it’s profound in the small and does make a statement in the large.  Like any good crossover, it stakes out ground of its own in between its two sources.”

Read on for our author interview, in which Oroboro discusses normal speaking voices, great lunches, and Japanese-accented orcs.
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AestheticB’s “Twilight Sparkle Gets A Free Salad”

16 Friday Sep 2016

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Today’s story puts over-the-top action on the menu.

free-saladTwilight Sparkle Gets A Free Salad
[Comedy] [Random] • 9,142 words

One beautiful morning, Twilight Sparkle decides she wants a free salad. After a small amount of theft, assault, battery, and arson, she sits down to enjoy what is sure to be the best tasting salad ever.

…Or she would have, if it weren’t for the Equestrian Intelligence Service locking her up as a potential threat to national security. Now, Twilight must escape a maximum security holding facility hidden deep underneath Canterlot. And to do it, she’ll need a paperclip, a spymare catsuit, an escape plan, and an alliance with the dastardly Drakbog, King of Frogs.

FROM THE CURATORS: While some stories achieve greatness because they invite the reader to explore hidden depths, there’s also something to be said for tales that make bold promises up front and then deliver.  Twilight Sparkle Gets A Free Salad — and its protagonist’s destruction of a fast-food restaurant — is firmly in that second camp.  “It’s a perfect exercise in over-the-top ridiculousness,” Present Perfect said.  “It’s one of those few random comedies that really avails itself well of both tags.”  For his part, Chris praised the balance it brought to that extreme approach: “Free Salad is a comedy of hyper-exaggeration, in terms of both characters and overall plot,” he said. “But while this might be an exaggerated setting, it’s a consistently exaggerated one, which lets the reader feel moored in the story even as they’re able to appreciate the absurdities on which it’s founded.”

What makes this story shine is that that exaggeration works.  “It’s about Twilight freaking out in a way that’s actually funny,” Present Perfect said, while Chris praised the range of its silliness: “Even outside of its core humor, there’s a nice blend of other comedy, from cheap shots at academia to visual gags rendered (often surprisingly well) into a written medium.”  Horizon appreciated that too: “Just because a comedy is random doesn’t mean it has to be dumb.  This cracks some remarkably sharp jokes, like The Manager’s academic background and Twilight’s explanation for her martial arts skills.”

And while not everything reinforced that humor, even the parts which didn’t had some pleasant surprises.  “For the most part, the fight scenes don’t contribute to the comedy — though gags like the salad left behind the blast door sneak in around the edges — but they are vivid and clever, especially the gravity manipulation,” Horizon said.  What that added up to, as AugieDog said, was a welcome bit of whimsy: “I did end up skimming the fight scenes, but this sort of smartly-delivered silliness always has a place in my cheese-like brain.”

Read on for our author interview, in which AestheticB discusses pony-filled singularities, justified justification, and melodramatically vomiting sisters.
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