Tag Archives: drama

Correct the Record winner: bookplayer’s “Lost Time”

19 Friday May 2017

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(Editor’s note: Imploding Colon [aka previous featuree shortskirtsandexplosions] declined a refeature for Austraeoh, our top vote-getter.)

Our recent “Correct the Record” contest asked readers to help us choose authors whose previously spotlighted stories weren’t the best showcase of their writing strengths.  Fitting, then, that today’s feature is about a romance being forgotten.

Lost Time
[Drama] [Romance] • 59,897 words

Rainbow Dash can’t wait for her first date with Applejack; they always have an awesome time hanging out, and a relationship just means there are even more physical activities they can try together. So when the dumb zap apple harvest postpones their date, she decides it’s the zap apples that are going to have to change their plans. Equestria should know by now that wild, ancient magic is no match for Rainbow Dash, especially when she might get laid.

Everything is going according to plan, until she crashes. Or, rather, until she wakes up after crashing and fifteen years have gone by. Fifteen years during which she seems to have been a very busy pony.

Now Rainbow Dash has to adjust to a life she never thought she wanted, and figure out if she’ll ever get to live the life that brought her here.

FROM THE CURATORS: The case for correction here was both simple and compelling. “[Previous feature] Of Cottages and Cloud Houses … does not reflect bookplayer’s claim to fame: shipping romance,” Catalysts Cradle said in Lost Time’s nomination.  “This is a really well planned and well executed story that touches on a lot of deeper themes absent from many other ship fics.”  Our curators quickly agreed.  “All I can say is, our audience has great taste,” Horizon said, amid superlatives like AugieDog’s: “This beat a story of mine in a contest and is also one of my favorite pony stories ever written.”

The main element driving our appreciation was the story’s novel approach to its central romance.  “In a lot of ways, Lost Time takes the idea of ‘Alien Shipping Syndrome’ and turns it inside out,” AugieDog said, “throwing Dash into what seems to her to be a sudden relationship with AJ and then not only showing us how that relationship developed but showing us the characters as they are now beginning to develop a new relationship.”  Horizon also commented on that multi-layered approach: “What’s remarkable about this is that it’s three stories in one — the romance with displaced Dash, the relationship drama with older Dash’s family, and the character drama of displaced Dash’s lost 15 years — all of which work both individually and together.”  And Present Perfect praised the core maturity: “This is, as I put it to myself, a very ‘grown-up’ fic,” he said.  “It’s very focused on the minutiae of a relationship, the meaning of marriage, the full weight of responsibility that having kids requires of a person. You just do not see people writing fanfics about that, and it’s the reason I love this as much as I do.”

The icing on this romance’s cake was exemplary character work.  “Dash is really marvelously used in the central role, contrasting her self-centered approach to daily life with her core loyalty, and naturally building a compelling drama out of that tension,” Horizon said.  “And the children are fantastic supporting characters — whip-smart without being written as tiny adults. Trying to maneuver around them adds an extra layer of complexity to the relationship difficulties. The dinner-without-vegetables scene in particular sticks out in my mind as heartbreaking.”  But equally compelling was the work put into the plot: “On a story level, too, everything dovetails so very nicely,” AugieDog said.  “The revelations in the last chapter are the best sort of revelations because I didn’t at all see them coming, but looking back, I can see them all making perfect sense.”  It all added up to a story deserving of its accolades, as Present Perfect said: “This is really just one of the absolute best fics I’ve read, period.”

Read on for our (all-new!) author interview, in which bookplayer discusses prompt tag, sizzles sold, and Star Wars rejections.

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Super Trampoline’s “Feeling That Way”

14 Friday Apr 2017

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(Note: We’re looking to re-feature three of our spotlighted authors, in order to offer them spotlights on stories more representative of their writing!  Our “Correct the Record” contest runs through Sunday, April 23.  Weigh in with your votes and nominations on our FIMFiction thread.  For a “ballot” with a compiled list of nominations and voting links, check this spreadsheet.)

Today’s story brings home the consequences of war.

Feeling That Way
[2nd Person] [Drama] [Slice of Life] [Tragedy] • 1,020 words

You’re drenched in sweat and ennui. She’s fighting the enemy, and you’re fighting depression. Stuck forever in a nowhere town, you try to rise above inertia, but you only end up feeling useless. You’re always feeling that way.

FROM THE CURATORS: When stories tackle challenging topics and perspectives, it’s all the more impressive when they stick the landing.  “While war fics are often a hard sell, this one works by recognizing that,” Present Perfect said in Feeling This Way’s nomination.  “The threat is nebulous and frightening, and since the idea of war doesn’t fit into pony society, the recognition of that makes this feel like a distinctly pony piece.”  And he wasn’t the only one impressed.  “This is certainly a great story, capable of imparting powerful emotion in so few words, subtle in its details, and yet very direct in its approach,” Soge said.  “It walks that fine line between melodrama and genuine emotion splendidly.”

But this story’s main claim to fame is more unusual: This is the RCL’s first feature with the Second Person tag.  “The use of second person strikes a very tight balance,” Present Perfect said.  “Third person would have been too distant for the emotions to hit home, while a first-person narrator likely would have been too familiar, spending time contemplating what certain emotions mean. Instead, we’re fitted into this pony’s life in no uncertain terms right at the start, and get to live out the story through his eyes.”  AugieDog agreed: “For me, the 2nd person works in the sense of the character talking out loud to himself, and I found it quite effective given the dry and dusty sense of madness lurking around the edges.”  And even the dissenters, like Horizon, were impressed with the power of the story. “I’m not as sold as PP on the benefit of the second person here, but that’s not the draw,” he said.  “The big thing right is the effective and efficient storytelling that is packed into the story’s thousand words.”

That quality of writing was apparent both in the large and small.  “I love how it manages to paint a history so rich in details without actually being explicit about any of them,” Soge said, while it was its thematic solidity which impressed Horizon: “All of the beauty is abstract and environmental to contrast with the personal doubt and pain, nicely reinforcing the main theme. The wham line at the end of the mine-tailings discussion is delivered basically perfectly, and adds a sense of layered tragedy.” The overall effect, as AugieDog said, was a hard-hitting short story: “This is very much about being frozen in place, but it still manages to present the reader with an entire world and a couple of characters who have to live in that world.”

Read on for our author interview, in which Super Trampoline discusses olines, happy horse noises, and strap-on horns.
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McPoodle’s “The Perfect Little Village of Ponyville”

24 Friday Mar 2017

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Open your eyes, and you’ll find that today’s story is quite a sight.

The Perfect Little Village of Ponyville
[Adventure] [Alternate Universe] [Comedy] [Drama] • 35,747 words

Vinyl Scratch wakes up to find herself the personal student of Princess Celestia, sent to the obscure village of Ponyville to oversee preparations for the millennial Summer Sun Celebration.

Vinyl can only imagine two possible explanations for what has happened: she has tumbled into an alternate universe where she’s Twilight Sparkle, or, after everypony telling her she’d do it eventually, she’s finally gone and lost her mind.

FROM THE CURATORS: Six seasons in, it can be interesting to return to some of the fandom’s earliest tales — and occasionally, quite rewarding as well.  “I’ve got some metafiction for y’all, from all the way back in the dimly remembered time of 2012,” Chris said in his nomination.  “Don’t be fooled by its age, though: this fic still holds its own, five years later.”  And, indeed, we found the quality of this fic leaping right off the page at us.  “The narrative voice just drew me right in as did the simple, sweet writing,” AugieDog said.  “I dislike the phrase ‘a facility of language’ because it’s so pretentious, but that’s exactly what I found myself thinking it demonstrated about halfway through chapter one.”

The main element drawing our praise, however, was the unusual way this gambled with its structure — and the rich way that gamble paid off.  “This is a fic which you have to give the benefit of the doubt, but I found that my tentative acceptance was repaid in spades,” Chris said.  “For example, there is in fact a reason why the narrator occasionally interjects to comment on the narrative structure.”  AugieDog agreed, with a musical twist: “Appropriately enough for something with so much music in it, this is a perfect example of what I’ve always thought of as ‘con brio’ storytelling,” he said.  “Right from the first dozen paragraphs, the author leaps off the narrative cliff while saying, ‘Leap off with me, and it’ll be well worth your time.'”  And Horizon appreciated the way it put those choices to deeper use: “It makes no apologies or excuses for its structural oddity, and not only manages to back-justify it, but also manages to use that unique narrative format to unroll character and plot.”

Add that to the richness of detail, and we found this an easy winner.  “All the flourishes around the edges really make it shine,” Chris said.  “The musical theme of the world (matching Vinyl’s interests) is just the most obvious and the one I’m best acquainted with, and it’s so well-formed.”  That those details were integrated so neatly into the story was the icing on the cake.  “We’re treated to a smorgasbord of cool headcanon that largely has retained its luster six seasons later,” Horizon said.  “I liked, for example, the explanation for Luna’s mane, and the addressing scheme for dragonfire letters — all the more so since that seemingly inconsequential detail smoothly shifts into a major plot point.”

Read on for our author interview, in which McPoodle discusses pessimistic inventresses, confounding satires, and repairing the perfect movie.
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Word Worthy’s “In Amber Clad”

17 Friday Mar 2017

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Wrap yourself in today’s story for an unusual take on a princess’ tale.

In Amber Clad
[Drama] [Slice of Life] • 1,484 words

Forged in fires of magic and charcoal. Worn with pride, damaged in battle after battle in times when ponies were no strangers to war. Repaired again and again. A regal mare’s suit of armour tells a small but significant part of her story.

FROM THE CURATORS: We’re always on the lookout for exemplars of the wide range of stories that can be told through fanfiction — which put this unusual examination of Princess Luna’s rise, fall, and rehabilitation right in our sweet spot.  “This is a nice historical piece, giving us a first-hand view of Equestria’s lengthy litany of conflicts, great and small, and it’s all told by Luna’s armor,” Present Perfect said.  “An interesting concept, and probably the thing that really makes this shine, no pun intended.”  He wasn’t the only one to note the piece’s ambitious scope.  “This walks the reader admirably from a pre-Equestrian time all the way to show (and comic) canon,” Soge said.

Much of our debate on the story, oddly, centered on the story not feeling unusual enough.  “This is less ‘what would a set of armour think/feel/believe’ and more ‘a well-known story told from a different angle’,” Chris said.  “Still, this story does combine a ‘faithful servant’ theme with the general plot of Luna’s ascension/fall/redemption.”  Soge was among the dissenters: “While the voicing of the armor isn’t particularly unique, I’d argue that the things it chooses to focus on are.” And Horizon found that compromise a strength: “It manages to make a potentially gimmicky story feel comfortable and plausible,” Horizon said. “And while it felt like a triumph of idea over execution, the prose didn’t get in the way of the idea.”

What tipped the story over the top were the little touches of worldbuilding that showed us MLP’s cast from a different angle.  “I also like the characterization provided through little touches like Luna’s reasoning for the armor’s form — which economically tells us a lot both about the narrator and the princess,” Horizon said.  Present Perfect agreed: “The armor even gets a little characterization when it encounters the armor Luna wears as Nightmare Moon,” he said.  “If anything about this story sticks with me, it’s that scene.”

Read on for our author interview, in which Word Worthy discusses diplomatic rifts, inside-out hats, and X-Files research notes.
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cleverpun’s “If You Came to Conquer”

27 Friday Jan 2017

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If you came for a solidly built Alternate Universe fic, today’s story delivers.

came-to-conquerIf You Came to Conquer
[Alternate Universe] [Dark] [Drama] • 5,959 words

Nightmare Moon won. She defeated Celestia, broke the Elements, banished the sun. This all happened a very long time ago. So long ago, that she has had plenty of time to change her mind.

Of course, fixing our mistakes is never so simple, and never without consequences. Even with particularly potent help.

FROM THE CURATORS: “This is an intriguingly crafted AU whose version of Nightmare Moon feels entirely plausible and whose Discord is quite solidly done,” Horizon said when nominating this fic.  “The story feels appropriately sparse and mythic, but what makes this worthy of the Library is the meditation on forgiveness.”  It quickly caught our attention on multiple levels.  “‘Nightmare Moon won’ is one of the oldest AU cliches there is, but cleverpun manages to use the idea to good effect here,” Chris said, while AugieDog brought out the superlatives early: “The scene at the end of chapter one is about as devastating a thing as I’ve ever read in a pony fanfic.”

But while our reactions to the story cited different strengths, one thing on which we all agreed was how powerfully it developed its premise.  “Just when you think you’ve seen the big reveal, everything escalates to another level,” Present Perfect said.  “And that ending, wow.”  Chris agreed: “The ending is the clear highlight to me, nailing that ‘surprising when you read it, obvious in hindsight’ effect that a good twist aims for.”  Meanwhile, Horizon praised how thought-provoking it was: “The story’s climax is effective horror that brings up some significant moral questions.”

And while the story worked powerfully on its own merits, several of us felt that it was best appreciated as part of the trilogy which it spawned.  “‘Conquer’ is a nicely twisted idea presented in a nicely twisted way,” AugieDog said, “but I would call the two sequels required reading, since they complete the story arc in such a wonderfully tidy fashion.”  Horizon agreed: “Continuing to read the sequels is very much worth your time.”

Read on for our author interview, in which cleverpun discusses blanket patterns, awkward melanges, and B-grade splatter films.
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Impossible Numbers’ “Lapidify: To See And Die”

20 Friday Jan 2017

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Today’s story features some rock-solid storytelling.

lapidifyLapidify: To See And Die
[Drama] [Horror] • 11,705 words

Ambergris is a pony of few pleasures, and being called out for meaningless social events is not one of them. When he bows to duty and attends, however, he barely reaches the home of his host before he is faced with something worse than tedious conversation. Something far worse.

The dreaded cockatrice, a creature capable of turning others to stone with a simple glance, has just entered the home of his host. Now a mere nuisance of an evening has become a monstrous nightmare, but as Ambergris struggles to save the occupants of the house, he must also struggle against the pressures mounting in his own mind.

FROM THE CURATORS: When RCL alumnus Skywriter offered this as a reading suggestion, describing it as “claustrophobic pony horror done the right way,” we found a great deal to like — starting with the lush narrative voice.  “Oh, this is lovely,” Chris said.  “The British Imperial tone of the narration fits perfectly with a story that blends foreign and familiar in its setting, and which explores pony race relations in the way this does.”  Present Perfect agreed: “I’d say the big draw here is the narration. Ambergris has a very strong, consistent voice, and the overall style of language is very pleasing.”

And while the horror was certainly effective, what drew the most consistent praise was the well-realized and imaginative setting.  “For me, the atmosphere was the big thing,” AugieDog said.  “The weirdness of the non-Equestrian setting and the hybrid building where most of the action takes place; the ‘haunted house’ aspect of having a monster with a sort of intelligence behind it; the matter-of-factness of the sentiment that ‘every town has this kind of dark wilderness somewhere nearby.'”  Horizon loved the worldbuilding: “Some awesome elements, like the mixture of pegasus and earth construction, are almost worth the price of admission by themselves.”  And Chris found those things accentuating the horror: “The physical setting is beautifully realized, with the cross-cultural house practically a character in its own right in the tense middle section,” he said.  “And how tense it is! There is some wonderful work here, keeping the readers on the edge of their seats.”

In short, this was a tightly-knit story where everything contributed to the ultimate impact — including its fine balancing act with canon.  “I’m really impressed with how this story takes a familiar monster from the show, instead of the more common otherworldly or bloodthirsty horrors of other fics, and uses it to great effect,” Present Perfect said.  “We know what a cockatrice is, we know what it does, but there are enough details thrown in here to create enough of a sense of the unknown that the horror can pervade the reader.”

Read on for our author interview, in which Impossible Numbers discusses cartoon gravity, deathless wars, and terrifying chickens.
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Orbiting Kettle’s “A Good Filly”

13 Friday Jan 2017

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Today’s story might just get you looking over your shoulder.

good-fillyA Good Filly
[Drama] • 1,099 words

There are rules for surviving in the Crystal Empire. Shining Facet knows them well, and only hopes her daughter can learn quickly. After all, they say that things are different now — but sometimes it takes more than flugelhorns and crystal-berries to heal old wounds.

FROM THE CURATORS: Discussing this story during the nomination process, we were all amazed that we hadn’t featured Orbiting Kettle’s work before: “Clearly an oversight on our part,” Soge said.

About the story in question, Soge went on to call it “dark and messed up in the best possible way.” Present Perfect “was floored by how quickly and easily it slides us into the situation and the mindset of our protagonist,” with AugieDog adding, “the story quietly examines the invisible shackles of paranoia, and the first tiny flickers of hope appear in such a lovely and understated way.”

Our discussion got more personal than it usually does, too. Soge recalled family members “who suffered persecution under the previous military regime in Brazil,” while Chris, calling himself “a man who lives in a low-crime city in a very white state,” found himself thinking of people he knows “whose ‘what to do when you see the police’ lectures from their parents included things that were totally absent from mine: things like ‘hide before they see you,’ ‘don’t tell them your address, just say “around here,”‘ and ‘don’t tell them your real name.'”

That a story of not quite 1,100 words can touch so deeply upon so many worlds of experience while still fitting perfectly into events depicted in a cartoon about colorful talking ponies says a lot about both the source material and the author who put that story together. So read on for our interview where Orbiting Kettle discusses friends, cheese, the end of fear, and the hope of the future.
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Tigerhorse’s “Her Soldiers, We”

24 Saturday Dec 2016

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Today’s story will be there for you in the dark times.

her-soldiers-weHer Soldiers, We
[Adventure] [Drama] • 42,716 words

Vesperquines — batponies — have faithfully guarded Equestria’s night for a thousand years.  Apart from Celestia, they alone have kept the memory of Princess Luna alive in their hearts.  And they alone know of their failure, of how they were not the friends she needed when jealousy and despair gnawed at her.

They pray for a second chance.  They vow to do better.

And then, one night, miraculously, she returns.

But the princess whose memory they cherish is still lost to her mad fury.  And for a young recruit of the Night Guard, the nightmare has just begun.

FROM THE CURATORS: Depending on where you read this, it’s getting posted either before Christmas or Auld Lang Syne, so it’s fitting that this week’s feature touches on the redemptive power of tradition and loyalty.  “This is a story about what the batponies — ‘vesperquines,’ which I thought was a good name for them — were up to during Nightmare Moon’s return,” Chris said.  “Tigerhorse paints the dilemma of the two protagonists — how must they hew to their duty to Princess Luna, when she won’t even acknowledge that name? — in a pleasingly grey light.”  Bleak circumstances which highlight all the more their dedication, as Present Perfect noted: “The strength here is Nebula’s unwavering faith in her princess, her belief that friendship will push Nightmare Moon to do the right thing and stop the assault on Equestria.”

It was the powerful treatment of that central theme that garnered the most praise.  “I think that it hit some great emotional notes, and the concept itself is genius,” Soge said.  “It’s a non-cynical take on the fix-fic, patching over some of Nightmare Moon’s inconsistencies, while establishing some interesting worldbuilding.”  Chris concurred: “It’s a great example of how to write a serious story based on a children’s show.  Heck, it even works Pinklestia in in a heartwrenchingly dramatic manner, which is not a phrase I thought I’d ever type.”  That surprising breadth garnered a number of other compliments, such as Horizon’s comment: “That this expands the story of Nightmare Moon from Ponyville to Equestria is sweet, sweet cake. That it offers a plausible and heartwarming explanation for Shining Armor’s promotion to Captain of the Guard is the icing on top.”

Those elements won us over despite several curators’ concerns about length and pacing.  “This could have stood to be about half the size, but it did an excellent job of thoughtfully stitching together a lot of apparently unrelated canon,” Horizon said.  “It offered a behind-the-scenes take of a story which a great many authors have covered, and managed to keep it feeling fresh.” In the end, we thought, it did too much right to ignore.  “Could it be better? Undoubtedly,” Present Perfect said.  “But what’s here is one of the best batpony fics I’ve ever read, and believe you me, I’ve read a lot.”

Read on for our author interview, in which Tigerhorse discusses pink snow, holes in the sky, and edgy fruit bats.

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SaddlesoapOpera’s “A New Age”

26 Saturday Nov 2016

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Today’s story lets us hear some voices from Equestria’s past.

A New Age
[Dark] [Drama] • 14,963 words

In the closing days of the Pre-Classical Era, at the dawn of the rule of the Royal Pony Sisters, the devastation of Discord’s cruelty hits hard and leaves an open wound. As the young and inexperienced Princesses Celestia and Luna struggle to keep the peace, powerful figures in all three Pony tribes bridle at the upstart Alicorns who so quickly and easily claimed power…

FROM THE CURATORS: Epistolary stories present a number of unique problems to a writer, but sometimes confining the narrative to letters written by the characters is the best approach to take.  And when Soge praised this story for “managing to showcase a variety of points of view from a number of very distinctive characters, all of which have great voicing and believable motivations,” the rest of us had to agree.

“Absolutely necessary from a storytelling perspective,” Chris said, while Present Perfect called attention to “the variety of media… the stories told, the multiple crumbling tragedies” and called the whole piece “unspeakably awesome.”

“The characters are perfectly voiced throughout,” AugieDog noted with Chris calling them “sometimes petty, sometimes poignant, but invariably fascinating.” “The way that the author weaves in and out of show canon, while simultaneously doing a ton of world building was particularly masterful,” Soge concluded. “But what really clinched the nomination for me is how, from so many disparate parts, a full narrative emerges.”

Read on for our author interview, in which SaddlesoapOpera discusses fictional vacuums, plausible reliability, and the earthy aspects of earth ponies.
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Shrink Laureate’s “Left Behind”

04 Friday Nov 2016

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Loyal RCL readers will find a treat waiting for them in today’s story.

left-behindLeft Behind
[Drama] [Slice of Life] • 4,721 words

Fluttershy has been called away on an adventure. An adventure without Rainbow Dash.

FROM THE CURATORS: This story came to our attention via the Flutterdash group’s third writing contest, where it felt somewhat misplaced — “there isn’t even a [Romance] tag,” as Present Perfect pointed out.  But Left Behind turned our heads with the power of its writing.  “When writing gurus talk about ‘show, don’t tell,’ this is the sort of thing they mean,” AugieDog said.  “We’re presented with a series of scenes, some in the present and some in the past, that add up to create a picture of Dash’s feelings toward Fluttershy.”

Multiple curators remarked on the story’s slow yet compelling build.  “There’s a lot here that’s enjoyable in its very low-key-ness,” Chris said, and AugieDog agreed: “It’s almost aggressively low-key. … The author paints with an admirably light touch, implying things more often than stating them, and we’re pretty much left to decide for ourselves how deep Dash’s feelings run.  And that to me is a real plus in this sort of story.”  Even slice-of-life hater Horizon was won over: “This felt like the literary equivalent of a well-painted landscape,” he said.  “Its biggest strength is in the way it chooses tones and contrasts to create depth.  But all of the characters are also individually great, especially Spike, and their concerns are so real and wide-ranging that this piece is bursting with life.”

While the protagonist was the biggest of those highlights — “this is one of the most solid pieces of Rainbow Dash-centric character writing I’ve ever read; it exemplifies all her best qualities while explaining away the worst,” Present Perfect said — some of the side characters were scene-stealers. “This story introduced me to Zephda shipping, and now I am on that ship really hard,” Present Perfect added.  And ultimately, all of those characters contributed to the emotional power of the piece.  “I especially appreciate the unspoken sense of sacrifice that permeates the mane cast, watching their younger sisters develop into normal lives while their own emotional bonds seem stuck in Harmony’s amber,” Horizon said.  “That lends this whole thing an air of powerful melancholy.”

Read on for our author interview, in which Shrink Laureate discusses cuddly villains, conversational props, and adorably horrible cosmic-ray ships.
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